Mischievous Mal

a whimsical assortment of odds and edds topped with a dab of bohemian clutter and a side of mischief. an unabashed cabinet of curiosities by a bright-eyed and bushy-tailed Killer Queen

Martin Shkreli: Digital Douchebag

There’s a lot of things one can say about pharma-bro, Martin Shkreli. Most of these prevailing opinions essentially point to the fact that he’s not a super good guy….

                     Not your grandma’s villain. 

Aside from his unremitting digital harassment shenanigans, hiking the price of his company, Turing Pharmaceuticals’, AIDS drug, Daraprim, from $13.50 to $750 per pill, condescendingly mocking Congress during the ensuing securites fraud investigations, he most appallingly bought the one and only existing copy of Once Upon a Time in Shaolin, a Wu Tang Clan album, for $2 million. 

Unlike other collector’s items that might be rare and endangered, or culturally significant, this is not only a one-of-a-kind piece, it’s the sole vestige of 6 years worth of Wu Tang’s blood, sweat, and legendary talent. It’s a hip hop icon that deserves to be preserved with upmost respect rather than auctioned off as a publicity stunt to feed Shkreli’s egotistically driven yet precariously fragile sense of self worth . My guess is Wu Tang would rather Kim Jong Un have won the bid than Shkreli, dubbed “the most hated man in America”. Wu Tang members had no qualms expressing  their unabashed disdain towards little old Pharma Bro. 
What makes the heinous act all the worst, is that he deprived the public of hearing the record via streaming. Of course, he did open up a few sample tracks as promised, after Trump won the election(an overt “screw you” to Clinton )

To say Shkreli has had a controversial past, even outside of the pharmaceutical hoopla, would be an understatement.  He’s posed a number of Twitter based snide, pretentious and utterly oblivious hate-fueled remarks against many high profile figures who have called out his unethical high jinks, including Hillary Clinton. And rather then make a simple statement back to the former president candidate he took a vehement vendetta against her, standing outside her apartment on periscope yelling things like “why are you so sick?”(he made numerous claims pre-election that Clinton showed obvious signs of Parkinson’s)

Other Shkreli Feuds:

  • Ghostface Killa
  • Patton Oswald
  • Stephen Colbert 
  • Lauren Duca (an incident that got him banned from Twitter)
  • Lil Wayne

At his essence Shkreli—rather than going into hiding like most on trial and under legal and social scrutiny would—uses a countless subterfuge of theatrics to remain quasi -relevant—using social media as a channel to obfuscate his unethical acts while extending  the unethical nature of his legal convictions and deplorable pharmaceutical business practices. The overarching theme he has to defend himself is that having acquired substantial money has made him better than others and immune from legal, social and ethical standards. *****

But after being convicted of two counts of securities fraud this past August (and the jurors had quite a few snarky Shkreli-based jabs of their own) Pharma Bro has decided to put the most valuable album having ever been sold up for auction on eBay. With 8 days left the 313 bids have already brought the albums auction value past $1 mil. Will be interesting to see if you and where this auction goes considering that on the one hand it is such a legendary collectors piece but is also in the current hands of America’s greatest villain. Take a look at the auction as it unravels here: Once Upon A Time In Shaolin

                     Shkreli’s Item Description

******Ironically as I wrote this I looked back to see if there had been any Shkreli news updates(I had a hunch or just have become so familiar with his relentless antics to know the likelihood of more Shkreli shenanigans) and saw several news report updated just posted ten minutes ago, wherein federal prosecutors filed a court motion for a judge to revoke Shkreli’s bail due to threats made on social media towards Hillary Clinton and harassing remarks made towards other women

This isn’t the end to my musings on Martin Shkreli. 

5 Things Not To Do At The Gym

Gym Etiquette 101

You either perceive the gym as an illustrious sanctuary or a demonic torture chamber But so much of the gym experience consists of your fellow members’ allegiance to the unwritten rules prescribed by basic gym etiquette. The gym caters to many varieties of gym goers with variegated levels of fitness experience.

Whether you’re a seasoned fitness expert or a unnamedsweatband-clad fledgling, there’s always a lingering need to learn or review the rules of conduct for appropriate gym use; you don’t want to be that guy at the gym do you?
Being the douchiest douche at the gym is no badge of honor.

Douchey McDoucherson—and yes there’s one or several at every gym in America — is as conspicuous as Richard Simmons gleefully prancing through a Muslim prayer hour. He’s the type of guy that fist pumps at a honky-tonk bar, the guy so lost in a fog of egocentric delusion and careless oblivion that he thrashes through that gym like a demolition derby. He pays no deference to others(aside from the hot babes), borders on a slight case of Asperger’s, and yep, you better believe his Insane Clown Posse torture music is on full blast.

9d05f618a9Douchy McDoucherson breaks all the rules, and not in a “a wild thing you make my heart sing” kind of way. Put simply, he”s an entitled shithead with major self-confidence issues, no respect for others, and an unwavering desire to achieve “ultramasculine” heavy-lifting feats for all to see; the only thing we care about, however, is for you to hopefully take a hike and quit being such a nuisance. In pursuit of inflated muscles, you’ve depleted every tinge of humanity once residing in your persona, making your Roid-addled Tazmanian Devil-like charades really very abrasive for everyone. But like the Energizer Bunny he keeps going and going.

Take a note from his bad behavior and learn what you shouldn’t do at the gym.

Don’t forget to have some fun!

5 Gym No-Nos

Thou Shall Not:

1. Harrass others with your vulgar grunt

While you think your unabashed benchpress bellow of a grunt oozes with masculinity, other gym-goers beg to differ. Your innapropriate dumbell theatrics are not only awkward, they’re practically offensive. If we want to hear grunts and moans , we’ll log on to YouPorn within the privacy of our own homes, thank you very much. So cut the dramatic shenanigans, gym cadets, a timid groan will do just fine.

2. Gab on the phone

And while we’re on the topic of uncalled-for noises,leave your extensive, loud, and highly personal phone convos outside the gym. The blatantly fabricated play-by-play retelling of last night’s “bang fest”(let’s get real, we all know you’re full of shit..no decent girl would go home with you)will definitely invoke an unsettling, awkward vibe. Pipe down bro, you’re there to work out, afterall.

3. Treat the gym as a social hour

While it’s great to have gym buds and be friendly with other members, keep the socializing to a minimum. You’re there to enhance your body which takes time and hustle, and so naturally it’s easy to procrastinate at all costs. But it’s not okay to interrupt someone’s climactic sprint for frivolous chit-chat. And a word to the wise, the heard-it-through-the-grapevine gym gossip circuit is infectious and littered with all sorts of personal details about gym goers. It’s best to stay out of it.

4. Overtly flaunt your goodies

Sure, the gym undeniably hosts a flock of fit, hot young adults making it the ultimate (sober) stomping grounds for coquetry. Butgym-rule-number-1 tame yourself, and keep the showcasing of muscles, boobs, and coats of makeup at bay. And as for you, drooling spectators, have a little self-control and quit with the ceaseless ogling eyes. A stealthy glance is fair game, but if you want to avoid becoming the Gym Creep, learn to practice tunnel vision to the best of your ability


5. Disrespect others’ workouts

Don’t treat the place like it’s your own personal mosh-pit. Be respectful to other members’ workouts: Wipe down the elliptical, benches, and any other gym equipment as a common hygiene courtesy; Put weights, mats, etc back where you got them from.; Be mindful and respect other gym-goers’ workout, making sure you’re not interrupting anyone’s set or hogging up the treadmill during rush hour, post-workday traffic. And there you have it: the top 5 gym no-nos.

This list of what not to do at the gym might seem like commonsense nuggets of wisdom, but you wouldn’t believe how many offenders there are out there. What are your gym pet-peeves?

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